Life Strides

darkelfqueen · 2014-10-02 20:28:04

The titles seemed kinda fitting.

As many of you know already, I've been on a semi-hiatus for about two weeks now. Between work, studies and everything else, the only time I had for internet was during commuting...And during commuting meant no computer. And no computer meant everything was limited. Well...to a great extent that was a bit better because I recently moved to Windows Phone which kinda meant that I had access to full Internet Browser as well as the mobile, so for example, I was able to collect my money easily. I actually did the latest event on an alt on the phone which was AWESOME!!! I still had problems with voting and viewing the last 100 votes as that needed more than one tab and better internet speed.

Anywaaaays, the reason I'm kinda writing this post is because I wanted to:

1. Say I'm back. Super happy about this.
2. Share an experience. I've been doing a lot of reading and asking around lately about how to live happier. How to be healthier. You know, the normal.

One sentences I read was "Sometimes the only thing stopping us from being happy is ourselves not money or time" and I actually kinda agree. Personally, the things that really make me happy are not material and more often than not, even if they are, they're very cheap normal stuff that we can get in our everyday lives.

I noticed that there were a lot of things I wished I would try or do that I keep on putting off. I also noticed that many habits I wanted to chance or start have been put off for a few years now. And I decided to kinda start changing everything one bit a time.

The most common advice I got was: Share your journey as you go on so you don't have the guts to go back. I mean...wouldn't sharing make the whole things more of a commitment? I think? Anyways I decided to try it.

And the first step I've taken is actually ... buy my first heels. I know...I'm in my 20s and I haven't worn much of heels. I wore tiny little kitten ones (that's a name for the type of the heel), but nothing too high. I was always scared of going around in them. Kinda worried I'd make a fool out of myself...And worried about my comfort. Soooo...I decided to break out of my comfort zone and got these. They are actually called LifeStride Shoes, soooo...there.

A first step? Does anyone have experience with changing lifestyles? Changing habits? Any helps would be highly appreciated.

angelfire · 2014-10-02 20:41:13

That's brill darky!

This advice I'm about to give (as narcissistic as it sounds) is more for me than you. I found that if you keep repeating things to yourself, you start believing it more than you already do. I do it for things tat hurt me and unconsciously too.
Try to start realizing when you're putting yourself down and consciously turn it into a good statement, repeating it throughout the day until you do it without thinking.

I've done it a few times, and I think it really helped. I still need more practice to stop myself from repeating harsh things to myself though.

laurabow · 2014-10-04 06:34:07

Cute shoes! The heel doesn't look too high, so you should still be comfortable and able to walk OK. I believe that's what the brand specializes in, too.

No advice from me, sorry. I just wanted to comment on your shoes. :-)

amaryllis-love · 2014-10-07 07:01:29

Oh boy, this is gonna be long.

Ok so, I love you Darky <3 And I miss you so much. So this is a good place as any to share something common that we have; fear of trying new things, and things that you really really want to do but because of some inner or outer negative thoughts about it, hesitant on trying it out.
I love shoes so much that sometimes when I stroll around an aisle that sells them, I just want to grab them all and run for my life. Sadly, that's illegal and also gonna be hard to cover up. Plus I'm too lazy for that.

Anyway, I'm afraid to go out alone at any time of the day or night, because from a young age, I have been closely watched and never been allowed to go out alone for more than a few minutes at times. And I'm sad to say that that has developed into this irrational fear about going out on my own. Hell, I would go out with a baby easily, but I can't for the life of me take a step outside alone without feeling a wave of panic wash over me and I end up asking somebody I don't even want to go out with, to go out with me.

So, I started to take baby steps. I asked dad to stop coming to pick me up to drop me off to university (same for A on the days that dad can't) and believe me that first time was awful. Awful. I chickened out so many times that I was half an hour late for my first lecture of the day. But despite it all, I like to think of it as totally and utterly worth the time wasted. I cried afterwards in the Ladies, but, ditto.

That was a few months ago, and now, I have no trouble at all going out on my own, as long as it's somewhere I know well.

So I guess what I'm trying to say is.. it doesn't kill to try. Just hurts like a truckload the first time but, it gets better with time. :D

Last edited by amaryllis-love (2014-10-07 07:03:34)

darkelfqueen · 2014-10-07 13:31:55

@angel: You know what? This is actually very good advice. I've been trying to keep track of what goes on in my head when I decide to fail. Yup....Decide to fail. I noticed that there are times when I tell myself things are never gonna work out and decide to end my chances myself. Stupid, no?

@laurabow: lol. Don't worry! I like talking about shoes and fashion, too! Fashion Buddies? I took out the shoes for a walk and a day at work and loved their feeling. I was kinda worried they'd hurt towards the end of the day, but they were actually very comfortable!

@amaryllis-love: AMARYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!! I really missed you so so so so so much!
This is actually ... really good advice, too. I should actually frame it and put it in my room somewhere:

It doesn't kill to try. Just hurts like a truckload the first time but, it gets better with time.
-Amaryllis-love

Not kidding!!
But it's actually very inspiring to read about your experiment/experience. It makes sense. You're so brave by the way! I'm so proud of you! And so glad it worked out!!!

@everyone:
You know what actually? For the last couple days, even though I was physically ill. I actually spent quite a few days without my voice at all. Depsite all of that, people actually kept commenting about me looking great and asking me what's different. Not kidding!!!

I didn't do anything different. One day, yeah, I wore something different in that I took out an old blouse of mine that I had stopped wearing for some reason I can't remember no matter what. And matched it with a sweater I had also stopped wearing for a while....And wore the heels. But that wasn't that big of a change I think?

The other days I was just normal. Wearing normal tshirts and sneakers and everything :P

picalilll · 2014-10-08 12:05:00

In the last couple of days big changes have happened in my life. I've now been at uni for 2 weeks and you have to become fully independent. Only now do I realise how I have to think about my dinner for the week and do more adultish things. The second thing is letting go of people, sometimes you can't hold onto certain things forever. Initially this crushed me, but I have done the right thing. I've had to get rid of the lies in my life and to end any more heart break. So I've moved on.

My advice to you, is if there are certain things in your life that aren't good for you, no matter how hard it is to let go you have to try and move on. Starting fresh, kinda like how you have

This past week had been very hard for me ending in a lot of tears and lack of sleeping, but it's all been worth it to feel this good again.

Announcement

#1 2014-10-02 20:28:04

Life Strides

#2 2014-10-02 20:41:13

Re: Life Strides

#3 2014-10-04 06:34:07

Re: Life Strides

#4 2014-10-07 07:01:29

Re: Life Strides

#5 2014-10-07 13:31:55

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#6 2014-10-08 12:05:00

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