Hi Guys,

I had been of OMD for a while before and recently I have come back as I have pretty much not a lot to do anymore at home, despite being quite busy. Anyway, about a month ago I started to create a plan for a new novel idea. The main character is kind of based on Zoe from Dreamfall: The longest journey, but its not in the future. (Sorry). Well this is the opening. Let me know what you think.

OPENING:

Natalie’s blue mini pulled up outside the school gates. She looked over at the tall teenage boy beside her, holding his backpack and his dirty rugby ball.
“Hey Nat, can you pick me up tonight after rugby?” Ashton asked nicely. Natalie hesitated and was silent. Ashton put his hand in his bag and pulled out a chocolate bar. “I’ll get you another one if you pick me up tonight.” Natalie smiled and took the chocolate bar off her.
“Okay, I’ll pick you up at five. Now go, I have to go to work.” Ashton opens his door and sees his friends waiting at the gate. He approaches them and throws the ball at Connor. Ashton waved at Natalie as she pulled away and drove off. Scott patted Ashton on the shoulder and sniggered, “Your cousin is hot”. Jay and Connor nodded in agreement. Ashton rolled his eyes and was quick to change topic.
“Alright guys, come on. The bell is gonna to go soon. You three at rugby tonight?” Jay and Scott walked up ahead with the ball. Connor looked at Ashton and laughed,
“Dude,” Connor paused as Ashton looked at him, “She is hot”. Ashton grabbed his head and messed up his hair and pushed him playfully.
“She’s too old for you man.” Connor laughed and pushed him back,
“Only four years. I’ve got time.” Ashton shook his head at Connor’s remark. The school bell rang and they headed inside.
    Natalie parks her car outside Beautiful Books. The shop window displayed numerous books and formed a tower, hiding the view to look in. Natalie pushed the door open and the rusty bell rang.
“Sorry we aren’t open ye-” Lionel failed to finish his sentence, “Oh Natalie your early, you can help me in the back here before we open.” Lionel had a bushy grey beard and antique brass coloured glasses. He pointed at pile of books on the shelf above, which was too high for him to reach. She put her handbag on the front desk and went back to assist Lionel. Natalie tied back her long black hair and bit her lip.
“I’ll get it Lionel. Just catch me if I fall and hold the chair,” she instructed. Lionel passed her the old wonky chair from the corner. Natalie stood on it and it wobbled. Lionel held the chair still and stood firm so Natalie could lean on him. Natalie reached up for the pile of books. Her fingers were covered in a thick layer of dust and some spat out from the shelves surface. Natalie coughed and wobbled. She turned her body to face Lionel and passed him the books. He grabbed them and took them to the till. Natalie slowly got down and joined him at the front. He thanked her and recorded the book titles in his lined notebook.
“I know you like your antiques, but I would consider buying a new chair,” stated Natalie.
“I know, that chair is nearly as old as me,” he joked. Natalie smiled and stroked the dust off the books. Lionel bent over and took out his diary from the top drawer in the chest behind the till and asked, “How are you then Natalie, family all well?” Natalie nodded,
“We are all fine. Jenny is up and down, but that’s just normal. How about yourself?” She asked politely.
“Yes, tickety boo. My sons should be coming down from London in the Easter holidays with their children. If only Ann was still alive, she would have loved to see her grandchildren.” Natalie smiled and nodded with sympathy,
“I’m sure Ann would be loved that. Are they definitively coming then?”
“As far as I know yes, I hope so. I haven’t seen them for about two years.” Natalie nodded and turned the sign round on the door to Open.